


The Choice

by JlynCSS



Series: The Choice Series [1]
Category: Legend of the Seeker
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-31
Updated: 2011-12-30
Packaged: 2017-10-28 13:34:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/308386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JlynCSS/pseuds/JlynCSS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kahlan must choose a mate to continue the line after Rahl kills all the remaining Confessor's on Valaria.  Set immediately following end of S1 Reckoning finale.</p><p>Winner of the Quarterly Fanfic Award at the CSS fan site.  My first fic ever -- originally posted at FFN Oct. 2009.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Zedd, Kahlan & Richard were still feeling jubilant following the death of Rahl. It had been a long struggle, but they'd finally won. Richard's happiness was compounded by the fact he had his two companions by his side again. Something he'd feared might not happen when he had been thrust into the future. Thrust into a cold, dark future. A future without Kahlan. Having successfully returned to his rightful time, with Kahlan at his side, he finally put an end to Darken Rahl and his evil reign over the people of the Midlands.

They'd spent the last several days camped not far outside Marley Glenn, a small town that had been loyal to the resistance. They'd enjoyed their time of rest and each other's company. This being their third day near the town, Richard said he was up for a bit of fun. "Let's eat"! Zedd suggested. "That sounds like a bit of fun I'd like to partake in".

Richard and Kahlan shared a knowing smile. Their friend was always ready for a meal.

They were heading for the local street fair, glad for it to be going on in town while they visited. There'd be plenty of food and perhaps a bit of excitement as well. Richard walked close to Kahlan, their shoulders touching every other step. Kahlan had noticed Richard stayed even closer to her than he had before…when Rahl was alive and evil was all around. Not that he was ever far, but since he'd come back from that dark place he'd told her of, since they'd stood on the cliffs at Marchers beach, they seemed somehow closer. While neither had said the words that day, they both had felt their overpowering love for each other. She was happy for it. She wished they could share more than the touch of a shoulder.

Reaching the fair, Zedd headed straight for the food. Richard and Kahlan found a table for the three of them. "How about some spice soup"? Richard asked with a smile as Kahlan took her seat. "Yes, please. That sounds delicious". Zedd returned first with a plate of various dried meats and fruit, setting it down where they could all reach it.

They sat quietly for a few minutes when Zedd finally broached a subject he'd been putting off. "I'm sorry dear one about Denee". Shota had confirmed to him that Rahl had in fact killed all the remaining Confessors, save one. Kahlan. Her sister, Denee was among the last to be killed when Rahl destroyed Valaria, their magical hiding place. She smiled softly, thankful for his sympathy toward her. "You're the last now". She had a feeling where he was going with this and she didn't like it. He continued, "There will never be another Confessor. Unless…." She looked at him with steely eyes "unless what"? She knew what he meant. She needed to take a mate. To bear a child and continue the line of Confessors. "Kahlan…" he spoke softly. "You know what must be done. No other Confessors can ever be – especially now that the Shirkhia have been destroyed. Now a Confessor can never be created, only born. And you are the last".

She could feel her eyes brimming with tears. How could she even think about taking a mate? How could she hurt the only man she'd ever loved or ever would love? "Zedd, please, isn't there some other way? Isn't there something you can do to make Richard immune to my power"?

"I'm sorry, my dear. There is not". He looked at her steadily. "You need to tell him what you must do. You must act soon, before we depart".

"Zedd, you can't expect me to do this now! We've just defeated Rahl. Richard and I did that together. How can I leave his side now? I know he loves me Zedd, and I love him. I can't do that to him". She also meant she couldn't do that to herself. It would destroy her. She might as well die right now.

"We are here in a town filled with people." He looked at her more pointedly. "Filled with men. You must tell him. Or I will".

xxx


	2. Chapter 2

From the shadow of the alleyway near her home, Tyra kept a watchful eye on the party. She'd been keeping a close eye on them since their arrival 3 days ago. She couldn't imagine what would bring the Seeker here, to the small town of Marley Glenn, but she was glad of it. Her idea of one day getting her hands on the Sword of Truth was one step closer to becoming a reality. Until 3 days ago, she hadn't a clue where to even look for the Seeker. Now he was here in her town, about to sit down to a meal with his friends. Barely 19, Tyra hoped to one day be a great sorceress. As it was, she was hardly any good as an enchantress, scarcely more than the town's fortune-teller. She worked hard at her studies, but there were so many spells to learn. It did not come naturally to her as it did for others. She was born with magic, but it seemed it was barely a spark. She hoped that once she had the Sword of Truth, she'd be able to tap into the great power she'd heard it held. Her skill was most likely insufficient for the task, but she could at least trade it to one more talented than she, in return for their knowledge and training. She knew just who she would go to. Grantham the Great. He'd given himself that name so how great he was she wasn't entirely sure. But he was a wizard, and she knew for certain he would be able to help her.

She quickly returned to her room. She went to the bureau, pulled one of the drawers and slower lifted the metal collar. An acquisition from Grantham the Great himself. It was a metal collar, the kind used to hold the magic of a Rada' Han. But even Grantham himself didn't have the power to create one of those. He used the collars for other various spells. The last one he'd created held a powerful current that, at his command, gave a terrific shock to the person who wore it. He had sold her this one for a nominal price. It held no magic so it was within her means. She brought the collar to her study area, where she kept her books, lists of spells and various herbs and oils she used for enchantments. She hurriedly flipped thru the pages of her books and combined some of the various herbs, carefully adding the right amount of oils. She slipped into a trance-like state as she spoke the appropriate words over the mixture. A waft of blue smoke spiraled up from the mixture and circled over the collar, surrounding it, bonding with it.

When the spell was complete she looked over the collar. Just to be sure she tried it on. As soon as the clasp clicked closed she felt her power drain from her. She knew it hadn't really left her…she didn't have power enough for a spell of that magnitude. But she could make it feel like her power was gone. A sly smile came across her face. Just to be sure she cast a light spell on the candles in the room. All of them immediately sprung forth with flame. She was disappointed, but not surprised that her magic still worked. All she needed to do now was somehow get this around the woman's neck.

Wouldn't Grantham the Great be surprised when she produced the Mother Confessor. Then he would know she was a woman worthy of his training. He would not only be delighted, but eager to take Tyra under his wing. When she arrived with the great prize that would bring them the Sword of Truth, he would be more than happy to share his secrets with her. Tyra knew she would have a much easier time with the Mother Confessor if she thought she wore a true Rada' Han. And she would have a much easier time getting the Sword of Truth, once she had the woman in white.

xxx


	3. Chapter 3

Zedd had intentionally walked well ahead of them on their return to camp. Richard tried to hide his disappointment that they were already headed back. Kahlan had seemed quite troubled when he had returned with their soup. She'd said barely a word all thru their meal. Richard suspected Zedd had said something to upset her and he meant to have a word with him about it, first thing in the morning. Right now, he just wanted to be near Kahlan. They would be camped near Marley Glenn for a few more days so there would still be time to enjoy some town fun with her before they were on their way again. They walked quietly down the wooded path. The glow from the moon was just enough to light their way. Richard knew, too, that she must be upset about Denee, having just recently learned of her death. He took her hand in his as they continued toward camp. He was glad she didn't pull away. They walked along, her warm hand tucked inside his own. "I'm sorry about Denee" he said softly.

Kahlan came to a halt. Those being so much like the words Zedd had uttered not long ago brought the pain she was feeling from unbearable to crushing. Yes, she hurt about Denee and the other Confessors. She not only lost her sister, they were all her dear friends. But the pain of what she knew she must now do was bearing down on her. She could no longer hold back the tears. Richard pulled her to him and let her cry. He didn't realize he was making it harder for her. Holding her close like this, feeling his warmth against her. She could barely stand with the weight of the pain. She clung tight to him, as if he were a lifeline. He took her face in his hands and wiped her tears with his thumbs. "I'm sorry Kahlan. I know how much you loved her". He looked into her eyes for a long moment. "You won't be alone Kahlan. I'm here with you and I won't leave you". An agonizing cry escaped her lips. She could no longer hold it in.

She pulled away from him. "Don't you see? We can't be together! Ever! Richard, the only thing left is for me to leave". Her heart ached, her legs trembled. She grasped his shirt in her fists, her face close to his. "I'm the last of the Confessors. There will never be another... her gaze slid to the ground as she loosened her grip, she couldn't look him in the eye. "…unless I take a mate".

Richard felt the breath knocked out of him. His eyes blinking back the pain. It had never occurred to him that she might leave. They had just defeated Rahl, he hadn't had a chance to think about things yet. He knew Kahlan was the last, but he hadn't really thought about the continuation of the line of Confessors. Or of her leaving. He refused to think about that. He lifted her chin with his finger, looking intently into her eyes. "Kahlan, I'm not leaving you. After all we've been through…we'll find a way. We have to be together. I don't want to be with anyone else". He stiffened as his hand dropped to his side, anger seeping into him. "I won't even _think_ of you being with another".

"I could never love another, Richard. But by order of the First Wizard, I must take a mate and bear a child". Richard staggered back from her words. His anger barely controlled. His words were seething: "By order of the First Wizard? Zedd is doing this to us?

It isn't 'Zedd', Richard. It's 'First Wizard Zorrander'. "He doesn't want to do this, but it is by his authority. The Wizards created the Confessors. I am duty bound".

Richard could barely speak past the lump in his throat. "This is not how I wanted this night to end". His mind raced with thoughts from all directions. "Kahlan" he took both of her hands in his. He held his breath a moment, knowing the reaction his words would produce. "Choose me for your mate". She was already shaking her head, trying to back away, but he held tight to her hands. He rushed his words hoping she would see his side of it "Neither of us wants to be with another. You can have a child Kahlan, my child. _Our_ child". Kahlan was finally able to break free of his grip.

"Richard, you _know_ I can't do that. You've seen what these men become once I've confessed them! How could I possibly do that to you?" Tears pooled in her eyes, her words softened. "It would destroy you". In barely a whisper she added "And that would destroy me".

A forlorn smile pulled at his lips. He was remembering their embrace at the beach. He knew she loved him as intensely as he loved her. It was one thing to not be able to be together until he found a way to make it work. It was entirely different to imagine her choosing someone else. Whether her heart was in that choice or not. Once she chose a mate, she would never be his. Overwhelmed by that thought, he tenderly laid a hand to her cheek. She saw the sadness in his eyes. He leaned in close to her, his eyes searching her face. He saw her pain there as well. He brought his lips within a breath of hers. "This is how I wanted the night to end" he said softly as his lips gently met hers. His hand slipped into her hair as their kiss deepened.

He ended the kiss all too quickly, but knew it was for the best. His emotions were getting the better of him. Kahlan was too numb to move. She tried to catch her breath as she watched him walk silently back to their camp, alone.


	4. Chapter 4

Richard made his way thru the forest back to their camp, not far from where he'd left Kahlan. He almost wished she'd followed him. He actually thought she might. But he didn't wait for her. At the moment, he needed the solitude. His mind was filled with so many thoughts, trying to think of a way to stop this from happening. He didn't have an answer for her. She hadn't really asked him for one, but he knew she was counting on him to find a way. He was furious with Zedd. First Wizard or not, he was his grandfather and Kahlan's friend. How could he do this to them? But Richard knew how. He understood it was Zedd's duty as First Wizard. But he didn't like it. Not one bit. He tried to quiet his thoughts. It wouldn't do any good to get into an argument with him, but they did need to talk about it. Richard felt confident that he and Zedd together could figure something out. They had to be able to find a way he and Kahlan could be together. They had to. Trying to calm his mind, he let his thoughts drift to the kiss they'd shared. His heart lifted when he recalled how she had welcomed his kiss. She hadn't pulled away in fear. Her lips were so soft, her touch so warm. It had taken all his strength to pull away.

Still feeling numb from all that had happened, Kahlan continued to sit near the pine tree, the spot where Richard had left her sometime earlier. She wanted to just stay there forever, remembering his gentle kiss.

She heard his words in her head, 'choose me for your mate. Have my child. _Our_ child.' The very thing she wanted more than anything in life, he was willing to give her, at the cost of his soul. It tore her heart that it could never be.

She knew Richard wasn't angry, he was hurt. And she had been the cause of that pain. Like her, he probably didn't know what to think, what to feel. She had wanted so badly to go after him, but what was the point? It would only cause more heartache.

From behind a small stand of trees, Tyra kept a watchful eye on the Mother Confessor. Having used a silencing spell, she had been able to follow the couple closely without being heard. She wanted to find their camp and had hoped for an opportunity such as this. Having watched the tender kiss between them, she knew she had the right plan for getting the sword. The Seeker would pay any price for the return of his love. And here she now sat, alone.

She'd have to be quick, but with the element of surprise, she knew she had the upper hand. She laid the crossbow she carried on the ground close by as she silently slipped up behind the woman. The confessor was in such distress, Tyra thought she would not have heard her even without the silencing spell. Quick as light, she clasped the collar around the woman's neck and jumped to retrieve the crossbow.

Kahlan's hands grabbed at the collar around her neck. She wasn't sure what just happened. She felt her power drain from her. She now knew all to well what was around her neck. She spun around to see a young woman before her, holding a crossbow pointed at Kahlan's heart. For a moment Kahlan thought to let her shoot, her heart was broken anyway. But instinct told her to resist, to fight. She might be under the control of a Rada' Han, but she could still fight. She pulled both daggers from her boots. Just as she was about to release one of the blades into the night air, the woman shot the bolt from her weapon. She had adjusted her aim before shooting, she didn't want the Mother Confessor dead, at least, not yet. The bolt hit Kahlan's shoulder, sending the dagger it held flying into the trees. She threw her remaining dagger, but her left arm did not provide her with the best aim and the woman managed to avoid the weapon. Tyra loaded another bolt taking aim again at her heart. Kahlan looked to her blood soaked arm. The bolt had gone clean thru leaving a one-inch hole in her body. The blood streamed steadily down her arm, thru her fingers, dripping to the ground below. In a voice much stronger than the woman looked capable of, she told Kahlan "I could fill you full of bolts right now. I suggest you come with me Mother Confessor".

At the moment, the woman had the upper hand. Kahlan would go with her for now. She would wait for an opportunity to strike when the odds were more in her favor.

Richard was becoming more agitated. He intentionally hadn't gone to sleep when he returned to camp. Instead, he'd sat down by the fire. He didn't want Kahlan to think he was angry at her, and wanted to be awake when she returned. He'd been sitting there for more than an hour, but she still wasn't back yet. He thought she too probably needed some time alone, but now he was getting worried. With Rahl dead and much of the D'Haran army disbanded, there shouldn't be much cause for concern, and they were near a town that had been loyal to the resistance. But then again, a thief in the night could be just as deadly.

Richard woke Zedd. He told him what had happened on the walk back from town. He told him he knew what Zedd wanted Kahlan to do, and he let him know his displeasure. But right now, he was concerned for her safety and he wanted Zedd to go with him, back to where he and Kahlan last were.

Richard had hoped they would meet up with her on the path, Kahlan having taken some time to be alone and just now making her way back to camp. He kept a close eye for anything that looked suspicious. Before long, he and Zedd had reached the spot Richard had last been with her. Where he'd left her. He berated himself for leaving her all alone. There was no one there. From where he stood he pointed out the spot to Zedd. "There, by that pine tree. That's where I left her" the words catching in his throat. Quietly he added "Where I kissed her". The two walked over to the pine tree to have a closer look. Richard's knees buckled when he saw blood in the very spot Kahlan had stood. He dropped to the ground to inspect the area more closely. There was a lot of blood. "Zedd" was all he could manage to say. The old man put a gentle hand on his shoulder "Dear Spirits".

xxx


	5. Chapter 5

Tyra urged the Mother Confessor along. They were still a mile or so from town and she was anxious to present her prize to Grantham. She had allowed Kahlan a moment to tie a bandage as best she could to help ease the flow of blood. It didn't do much good. She almost offered to help, but thought it best to keep her well guarded with the crossbow. They had continued on in silence since then, Kahlan in front, Tyra behind with her weapon pointed at Kahlan's back.

Richard and Zedd had little trouble tracking them, not only was Kahlan's abductor careless in not covering their trail, but they only needed to follow the blood. Kahlan's blood. Richard's stomach was tied in knots. He tried to stay focused, but his mind started to wander to what evils might be befalling her right this moment. Zedd sensed his alarm and tried to reassure him. "Well find her my boy." He patted his shoulder as they continued to move along swiftly. Richard nodded trying to reassure himself as well.

Grantham was indeed pleased with Tyra's prize. She had been right. He was more than willing to take her under his wing in exchange for the Mother Confessor. He knew if he held her, the Sword of Truth would soon follow. He was a bit surprised to learn just how simple Tyra's plan had been. Seems the Wizard's First Rule can befall anyone. The Mother Confessor truly believed her power was suppressed because she believed she wore an actual Rada' Han. He of course, did not share this information with the confessor and knew she was deadly in more was than one. For that reason, he kept her confined to a cell. The same cell he kept people in when he was practicing spells and incantations on them, far beneath his shop, so no one could hear their screams.

Richard and Zedd arrived at the town just after dawn. The trail was harder to follow in town but Richard could still make it out. Though it made them harder to track, he was relieved to see that Kahlan's bleeding seemed to have subsided. They made their way down the narrow dirt streets. The trail came to an end in front of an apothecary shop, the door tucked away in the corner of a small alley. Not knowing what to expect on the other side, Richard drew his sword. Zedd followed him in, close at his heels.

"Kahlan!" Richard called for her as soon as he was inside. He carefully checked two of the rooms off the hallway. "Kahlan!" Zedd checked another room. He called for Richard. Richard found him with a wizard's web cast around a young woman. "Where's the Mother Confessor"? Richard demanded thru clenched teeth, his sword at her throat. The girl stammered "I…I don't know. Grantham the Great wizard wouldn't let me know where he was keeping her". Richard could feel the swords magic, his anger, raging through him. "Keep an eye on her" he told Zedd. He went to search the remaining room.

Richard found a trap door in the floor of the room. It was partially hidden under a desk and a small carpet. He threw his weight against the desk shoving it aside. Pulling open the door, he bypassed the steps and dropped himself directly to the ground below.

He found himself in an underground tunnel. The dirt floor, ceiling and walls absorbed most of the light given off by several torches.

Sword in hand, he rushed down the dimly lit passageway.

Through the bars, Richard could see Kahlan chained to a wall by her wrists, her feet barely touching the ground, a Rada' Han around her neck. His eyes flicked to a man standing much too close to her. He was pressed up against her side, with a hand buried in her hair, his other hand sliding up her thigh like a snake. "Remove your hands" Richard seethed. He gripped his sword tightly allowing the anger to flood his body. Kahlan was barely conscious, her head held up only by the man's lecherous hand. She didn't seem to notice him or Richard.

Seeing Richard only provoked the man. He pressed his sweaty face against her cheek as he slid his snakelike hand up her body, over her dress, gripping one of her breasts. "I can see why he's so fond of you Mother Confessor". He ran the full length of his tongue along the side of her face. Richard moved like an enraged bull. He used his sword to break the lock on the bars, kicking the door with such force, the sword had barely been necessary. He strode directly to the man, his blade raised, eager to slice him in two.

Grantham unleashed a stream of wizard's fire. Richard knew instinctively how to defend himself against this. He had once battled Zedd this same way, when Zedd had been confessed. Zedd's magic had been much more powerful than this. Grantham the Great was no match for the Seeker of Truth. Having his wizards fire reflected back on him knocked Grantham off his feet. Richard didn't hesitate to slice him thru with his sword, twisting it in the vile man's stomach. Richard shook with the rage he felt at this man's lurid touch on Kahlan. He turned to her.

"Kahlan!" He sheathed his sword as he strode toward her. Getting no response, fear gripped his heart. He lifted her head in his hands, he wasn't sure if she was unconscious or slipping away into death. He pressed his cheek to hers, tears falling down his face. What had they done to her? This was his fault…if he hadn't left her…Still holding her head tightly he whispered into her ear, "Kahlan, stay with me. Don't you leave me. Come back to me Kahlan". He pressed his face tighter to hers, desperation taking over him. "You can't leave me Kahlan. I love you. You must know I love you." Her head moved slightly side to side with her barely audible reply "No, Richard. Don't say that." His relief at hearing her voice competed with the pain he felt at her protest. How could she deny him his love? Holding her face tenderly, he leaned his head to look into her eyes. Her beautiful blue eyes. He could stare into them forever. "Kahlan, I love you. You know that. You must know that." A tear slid down her soft face. "Don't say that..." A hint of a smile touched her lips, she continued, "...not when I'm chained to this wall and I can't put my arms around you." Richard's knees went weak, relief flooding his body. Holding her with one arm, he pulled his sword from its scabbard and had her free of the chains in an instant. Kahlan fell into his arms as she was released. Richard let the sword drop to the ground to keep hold of her, pulling her close. In the damp darkness of the cell, they clung to each other.

Relieved to find her safe, yet still feeling the anguish at having her taken from him, Richard gripped her shoulders more intensely than he realized. Kahlan looked to the ground trying to hide the pain in her face. He stood there, holding her shoulders, soaking in the sight of her, willing her to look up into his eyes. His whisper came in a rasp "Kahlan". Slowly her blue eyes came up to meet his. "Thank the spirits you're all right".

"Richard, I..." Before she could say anything more, his lips tenderly found hers. Richard relaxed at the feel of her mouth on his. He let the warmth of her melt into him as he tightened his embrace, pulling her to him. She held tight to him, so relieved to be with him again, to feel his warmth against her. She had feared she'd never see him again. She had feared she would never have the chance to be with him, to kiss him, to hold him.

Now that she wore a Rada' Han, that's exactly what she intended. She'd had plenty of time to think about it as she hung by her wrists in this dingy cell. All she could think of was dying here, never having held him the way she wanted to.

xxx


	6. Chapter 6

"I'm alright Richard. I mean, aside from my shoulder, I wasn't hurt". Kahlan insisted, "I'll be okay." Zedd had healed her shoulder and she was physically fine, but she'd been through a lot. Richard's face showed he wasn't totally convinced.

Zedd motioned to the collar around Kahlan's neck. "Now what about this"?

Richard moved to stand before Tyra. Zedd had removed the wizard's web he'd used on her. He didn't feel she was much of a threat and had decided to just keep a close eye on her. "Give me the key" he demanded.

"I….don't…have the key" she stammered, frightened by the look in his eyes. "I mean, I have it, or, I did have it…I haven't been able to find it. Please, don't hurt me." Richard could only shake his head in disbelief at her bumbling.

Zedd came over to stand by him. "You take Kahlan back to camp. She should rest. I'll take this one and search for the key. We'll look here in town first then search the route she took with Kahlan through the woods. Perhaps she lost it along the way". Zedd knew it would be like searching for a needle in a haystack, but what choice did they have. Without the key, the collar would not be coming off.

Their walk back to camp was filled mostly with conversation of what happened to Kahlan. She told Richard how Tyra had been able to sneak up on her and get the Rada' Han around her neck, how she'd tried to fight before she was shot with the crossbow.

They arrived at camp and Richard started a fire. Once he got it lit, Kahlan put a hand to his shoulder, turning him to face her. "I'm sorry Richard. I hate that I'm the cause of your pain. I hope you realize how painful this is for me as well". He tried to give her a smile. He did know. "Right now, what you need is some rest. Why don't you wash up and then lay down for awhile. I'm not going anywhere. I'll be here when you wake up, we can talk then". Kahlan nodded and went to do as he suggested.

Kahlan awoke to find Richard sitting close by. She saw his eyes shift from her to the fire once he realized she was awake. He asked how she was feeling. "Feeling like I'd like a walk. Would you join me?"

"Sure". He stood, letting her lead the way. She grabbed a blanket so they'd have something to sit on. Kahlan wanted to talk with him and was afraid Zedd might return. She didn't want him interrupting them. This was too important. She decided to walk to the lake, near where the river joined it. It was pretty there and peaceful.

Richard could tell she wanted to talk so once they arrived he surveyed the area and chose a spot near the water. It was secluded by the high grasses on one side, the lake on the other. He could faintly hear the river gurgling in the distance.

He didn't want to have this conversation. He knew she was going to tell him she was leaving. His insides were twisted in knots. She'd probably stay right here in the town of Marley Glenn to find her 'mate' once he and Zedd moved on. How was he supposed to do that? Move on. He wouldn't be able to take one step from this place without her by his side. He had realized as they passed out of the town earlier that he was glaring at every man he saw, wondering if he would be her chosen. His blood still boiled at the thought. He could barely breathe each time he remembered seeing that snake Grantham with his hands on her…What Richard had said to her back in that cell applied now. He heard himself saying those words to her again: "Stay with me Kahlan. You can't leave me. I love you". This time, Kahlan looked lovingly back into his eyes, putting her hand gently to his face. "I know you love me Richard. I'll never leave you." She leaned forward to meet his lips in a sweet, tender kiss.

Richard jolted from his thoughts. His mind tormented him. Like it or not, the time was here.

Through a heavy breath, he finally asked her "What's on your mind?" She looked at him, not quite sure how to begin. She handed him the blanket and waited while he spread it out. He sat down facing the water. She moved to sit by him, and wrapped her arms around her knees. She didn't answer his question. She was silent for a long time, her mind focused on all that was before her. She started rather hesitantly, "Richard, I've been thinking…" she waited until she was sure he was looking at her "…about what you said. About choosing you. You know I want that more than anything, don't you? I wish it could be that way. I wish there was a way for me to just be a normal woman". Richard was thinking he loved her just the way she was. "But there isn't" she continued. Her gaze slid to the ground, her hand slowly coming to touch the Rada' Han. He could barely hear her next words she spoke them so softly, "At least, not permanently".

He gently lifted her chin with a finger. "What are you saying"? He wanted to be sure of what she meant.

She looked into his eyes. "I'm saying that, at least while I wear this, you and I can be together".

He took her arms and pulled her up to stand with him. Holding her shoulders he looked intently in her face. "Kahlan, I love the woman you are, the entire woman. I don't want some magical object to be the only way I can share my love with you. I'm going to find a way for us to be together". She had no doubt that if there was a way, he would find it.

"There isn't much time, Richard. Zedd said I must choose a mate before we leave". Just hearing those words 'choose a mate' made his blood run cold.

Her blue eyes beseeched his, willing him to understand just what this would mean for them. "This isn't the ideal way, but it _is_ a way. Can't we at least have this"? He certainly wasn't going to refuse her that. Why couldn't they? He wasn't in danger of being confessed, she wore a Rada' Han. He wanted to be with her even without it, but he knew she wouldn't allow it. She'd already told him so. The Rada' Han was the only way she would allow it to happen. Yes, why couldn't they at least have this? He would finally know the softness of her touch. He could finally show her all she meant to him.

A cold thought struck him. His words came out more forceful than he intended, "And after? What happens then? Am I supposed to just let you go and choose a mate then? How do I do that Kahlan? How do I go on knowing another man holds you? Knowing you're bearing his children? Knowing I'll never see you again. What if, when you chose your mate, you're already carrying my child? What then, Kahlan?" Tears of pain and frustration ran down his face.

Kahlan lowered herself to the blanket and began to weep. He was right, of course. But that didn't stop her from wanting him, from needing him. Richard remained standing while she wept. He stared at the water, lost in his own agony. He finally pulled himself out of it, lowering himself next to her. He held her to him, her body shaking with emotion. His tongue felt too thick to speak. He could only manage to quietly shush her, as his hand stroked her hair. Kahlan quieted down with her arms wrapped around him. She sat up straight, wiping the tears from her face with the palms of her hands.

"I don't know what the future holds, Richard. All I know is, I want to at least once experience real love with a man. I'd especially like my first time to be with the man I love. The only man I'll ever love". Her fingers again went to the Rada' Han. "This is the only way I know for that to happen".

He looked at her for a long moment. He extended an arm, his fingers lightly exploring the collar before moving to caress her neck. "I love you Kahlan, with magic or without".

He leaned close and pulled her into a fervent kiss.

xxx


	7. Chapter 7

"We've been traipsing all over this forest for hours"! Zedd's bold yell was frightening the squirrels. Tyra didn't look too pleased either. "How could you possibly misplace the key to your "prize"? Did you roll out of bed that very morning and decide 'I think I'll capture the Mother Confessor today?' Really child, what got you into all this? You're obviously not an experienced villain". He had asked the question but he didn't really expect an answer. He was pulling her hurriedly along, heading back to town to search there again. Tyra explained that she really didn't want to hurt the Mother Confessor, but she was desperate for help. When she saw the Seeker in town with the Sword of Truth in hand, she seized the opportunity. She knew it was foolish now, but Grantham 'the Great' had filled her head with ideas on how he would help her to become a great sorceress. She was incompetent even as an enchantress and had wanted his help. Zedd felt sorry for the girl. She was young and inexperienced. She was on her own, easy prey for the likes of Grantham.

Back at the apothecary shop, Zedd once again began pulling each of the little drawers out of their slots. There were dozens of them, this would take some time. Tyra stopped him. "First Wizard…you don't actually need the key.

"What? Of course we need the key, the Mother Confessor needs her power, we can't keep her locked in a Rada' Han and powerless for the rest of her life." Tyra slowly backed away from him, keeping her eyes on his. "It's not truly a Rada' Han, she still has her power".

Zedd eyed her suspiciously, "What do you mean, it's not truly a Rada' Han? What is it? Where did it come from?"

She took a few more steps back. "It's an enchantment".

Zedd's eyes told her to explain, quickly.

"I told you I'm merely an enchantress. I purchased the collar from Grantham. It was just a collar; it held no magic. I enchanted it with a spell, to make it feel like her magic was being suppressed. It only feels to her like her power is gone. But it's not. I knew if she didn't feel her power, she wouldn't try to use it, not if she believed it was being suppressed by a true Rada' Han."

"Dear Sprits, you don't know what you've done. You don't understand how dangerous this can be!" He grabbed her wrist. "You're coming with me. We have to find the Mother Confessor and the Seeker! Now!"

Kahlan wound her fingers into Richard's hair as the passion in his kiss melted into her. She wanted to remember everything. What it was like to be with the man she loved, the feel of his touch, his scent, the taste of him. It would need to last her a lifetime. She wrapped her arms around him, letting her hands freely roam his firm body as they kissed. Richard's passion was without restraint. He could barely breathe for want of kissing her. He gently pulled her to the blanket, lying on his back, his powerful arms pulling her to his chest. Her hair fell from her shoulders, enveloping him as they kissed. He wound his fingers into her long, thick hair, holding her to him, kissing her with an all consuming desire. He felt as if he were drowning…drowning in her. A small gasp escaped his lips. If this was to be his death, let it come...

There beside the lake, the sun shinning on the water, with the distant sound of the rushing river, they were one. Richard made love to her with all the passion and intensity of a man who would never hold his love again.

.......

Overcome with emotion, Richard whispered her name. Kahlan had never dreamed she would ever know such passion, such desire. Such love. He looked into her eyes, taking her face in his hands and kissed her softly. He was flooded with joy at being able to share himself with the woman he so loved. Looking into those blue eyes, words didn't seem enough, but he said them anyway. "I love you Kahlan. From the first moment I saw you". She touched her hand to his face and looked at him as if she were looking into his very soul. "And I, you, Richard". For the first time since he had left Westland, his heart was truly at peace.

xxx


	8. Chapter 8

Having slept blissfully in Richard' arms, Kahlan awoke to the feel of his soft kiss along her back. A smile he couldn't see spread across her face. He felt her stir and pulled her closer. Kahlan wished it could stay this way forever. The actuality of what lay before them was too unbearable, neither dared think about it. Richard continued kissing her as he gently rolled her to face him. "Well, if it isn't the Seeker" she said, giving him a smile she gave no other but him. "You were expecting someone else"? he teased. He returned a smile and leaned close, until his nose rested against hers, content to just be near her. They lay like this for quite some time, lost in thoughts of each other.

Richard's fingers touched the collar around her neck. "So how does this work anyway? Does is somehow 'negate' your power, render it harmless?"

"No, it suppresses it my power. It's as if I have no magic".

A quizzical look came over his face. "But you did release your power, Kahlan. I felt it".

She looked at him as though she thought he'd been hit on the head. "Richard, that's impossible. I would know if I released my power I would have felt it. I didn't."

He insisted, "Kahlan, yes you did. I felt it pass thru me".

She stared at him. She knew if she had released her power, they wouldn't be having this conversation. He'd be on his knees, pleading for her command.

She asked as if demanding proof, "When? What was happening"?

He raised his eyebrows as if asking did he really need to answer that question.

Kahlan blushed slightly. "You mean…we were...?"

"Well, no…not exactly. It happened early on." With a boyish smile he added, "I believe I was somewhere near your bellybutton". She pushed at his shoulder with the back of her hand, but she smiled too.

Trying to prove him wrong she asked, "If you felt my power, why didn't you stop, why didn't you say something"?

He shook his head slightly. "Kahlan, at that point, a team of war horses couldn't have gotten me to stop".

She suppressed a smile at the declaration of his desire, trying to remain focused.

Still not believing, she continued "Richard, it's just not…it's… impossible. What did you feel"?

He paused as he thought how to explain it. "Well, I guess the best way to describe it is like…wind. A powerful, warm wind rushing through me, lifting me, pushing me back. It felt like it would drag me away and take me under. I wasn't about to let anything take me from you. So, I just held tighter to you and kept kissing you.

Kahlan knew it was impossible for him to remain unaffected if she had released her power. But right now, she didn't want to spend what little time they had left discussing how her confessor's power worked. "Richard, Zedd's going to be back soon, he might already be at camp. There's something I was hoping to show you before we head back. Don't you think it's possible that perhaps you were just 'caught up in the moment' and that's what you felt?"

"Perhaps." He wasn't convinced, but he could see she didn't want to talk about it anymore.

Kahlan rolled to face him, the length of her against him. Richard's mind was fully on the woman before him. "What is it you want to show me?" he asked. She put her arms around his neck and wrapped her legs around his, pulling him to her. She brought her lips seductively close to his so they brushed the corner of his mouth as she whispered "I want to show you just how much I love you, Richard". Her lips took his in a passionate kiss as she rolled him under her…

xxx


	9. Chapter 9

Back at camp, Richard and Kahlan tried to busy themselves to keep their minds off what lay ahead. Kahlan was making a root stew for their supper. Richard was splitting more logs for the fire. His anger had been slowly seeping back into him. He liked using the axe…each swing brought some bit of release of that anger. He wouldn't take back a single second of what they'd shared, but now that they had, how would he ever let her go? He wiped the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand and brought the axe down again. As he worked, he recalled every exquisite detail of that moment with her; the smooth feel of her form, the scent of her skin, the taste of her lips. The warmth of her body against his. She had asked him to be her first. He had wanted to give her that. He also wanted to be her last. Her only. He reached for another log.

Zedd arrived back at camp with Tyra in tow. "Richard, Kahlan! Thank the spirits you're here." The old man was out of breath, leaning on his knees trying to breathe air into his lungs.

They gathered around him, seeing he had important news to share. Richard put a hand to Zedd's shoulder, "Are you alright? Sit down here." They all took seats around the fire.

He looked to the two of them, his eyes going from one to the other. "How are things here? Are the two of you alright?"

Richard could see his grandfather's distress. "We're fine Zedd" he reassured him. "What's the matter?"

Zedd looked to Kahlan. His tone frigid, "You're a very dangerous woman right now, Mother Confessor".

Her back stiffened. Richard stood to move behind where she sat, resting a hand on her shoulder. He looked to Zedd "What are you talking about Zedd?"

He gestured to the collar around her neck. "That's not a Rada' Han she wears."

Kahlan's eyes narrowed. "I don't understand".

Zedd told them Tyra's story, what she had done and why. Tyra sheepishly confirmed the truth of it.

Richard's grasp on Kahlan's shoulder tightened as Zedd had told the story, as the reality of what he was saying hit him.

"Zedd", Kahlan said, "it must be a lie. That can't possibly be true". But Richard knew it was true. He knew the moment Zedd had said it. He had felt Kahlan's power. She had released her power and he was left unharmed.

Richard knelt down in front of her, taking her hands in his. He looked up into her eyes. In a low voice that only she could hear he said, "Kahlan, don't you see? I told you I felt your power."

Her bewildered reply came just as quietly, "But…that's impossible. How could…we were…" Richard leaned closer, "Let me talk to him?" He wanted to spare her any uneasiness of talking with Zedd about what happened between them. She nodded to him. His gaze went past Tyra as he looked to Zedd. "Zedd, would you join me please? We need to talk". Zedd rose and followed him out of the camp.

Within sight of their camp, but tucked in the privacy of a stand of pine trees, Richard held Kahlan in a loving embrace. She was still amazed at what Richard had told her. "I can't believe Zedd knew all this time there was a way for us to be together". She laid her head on his shoulder squeezing him tighter. Richard explained again, almost as much to himself as to her, "He couldn't tell us or it wouldn't have worked. He knew I had to love you completely, more than life itself, without any reservation, for your power not to destroy me. If I had known before hand, that would have left room for doubt if I actually loved you enough, enough for your power to have no effect on me. I had to realize it on my own that I'd rather be under your power than live life without you. Only in that way was I protected".

She looked up at him, happiness shining in her eyes. "So we can really be together, I'll not have to stay here and choose a mate?" Richard clutched her face in his hands, tilting her head to look squarely at him. His eyes were firm, as was his voice, "You'll have no mate besides me." She leaned in to kiss him again. She didn't want to ever stop kissing him. The urgency of his kiss grew as his mouth moved down her neck. He let out a small sound of frustration when his lips encountered the collar.

Kahlan pulled back, gently pushing him with her hands. "Wait, I want to show you something."

He pulled her tighter, "Really?" he asked with an impish smile, recalling the last time she had said that.

She gave him a crooked smile as she broke free of his embrace. "Wait here." She half ran the short way to camp and grabbed her pack. She brought it back to where Richard waited. She searched inside and pulled out a thin chain, handing it to him. He held up the chain and saw the small key hanging from it. He'd seen a key like this before. It looked like the same type of key used for King Gregor's Rada' Han. His eyes shot to hers.

Sitting near the campfire, Zedd and Tyra were eating the stew Kahlan had made. "So, what made you decide to suddenly tell me the truth? That the collar Kahlan wore was not a true Rada' Han?"

"Well, we had been searching a very long time…and we were back at Grantham's apothecary shop, I saw all of those drawers you needed to search through again and…well…I was hungry. I wanted to go and get something to eat."

Zedd laughed out loud, a big smile on his face. "Seems there's hope for you yet child."

Richard stood smiling, staring at her in disbelief. "You had the key? All this time?"

With a sheepish grin, Kahlan nodded her head. "I was able to get it away from Tyra without her knowing. But Grantham had chained my wrists before I'd had a chance to use it."

Still smiling, he said more as a statement than a question, "And you didn't see any reason to tell me you could free yourself from the magic of a Rada' Han." Kahlan now wore the impish grin as she shook her head no.

Richard unlocked the collar and tossed it aside. Rada' Han or not, he was glad to see it off her neck at last. His hands gripped her waist as his mouth went to wear the collar had been, kissing where his lips had not yet touched, as if making up for lost time.

Kahlan gently brought his face to hers, their lips melting in a tender, passionate kiss. A kiss not bound by fear of her power, nor encumbered by a collar. She was a woman, just like any other woman. Kissing the man she loved. Free to love the man she chose.

Richard took her hand, and began pulling her along with him, heading back toward the lake. A big smile came across his face. "Come with me. I have something I want to show you." Kahlan, her hand in his, eagerly followed along.

 

 **The End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is story 1 in a 4-part series. Hope you'll watch for story 2 "The Awakening". Thanks for reading!


End file.
